Celine Dion/Anastacia – You Shook Me All Night Long
Let me introduce you to a cover version that provides final, irredeemable proof that the lifeless body of Rock has been drained to a point where the veins gurgle, spit and splutter.
And the liquid that sluices out? Pure molten cheese. This cover version shines the spotlight on all that is wrong with humankind, and illuminates the grimiest of nooks.
So, a question: what could be worse than a siren-lunged ‘Diva’ belting out AC/DC‘s You Shook Me All Night Long? Yes – two siren-lunged Divas belting out AC/DC‘s You Shook Me All Night Long.
Remember the day: Anastacia and Celine have revealed themselves to be the true Axis Of Evil. It’s a genuine miracle that when the two of them were together in the same room, the world didn’t end, sucked into an infinite vortex of bland.
After you’ve peeked through your fingers at this monstrosity, you’ll wish the world had ended.
Anastacia contributes her usual lung-popping, vowel ‘n’ bowel-straining interpretation of the English language, while Celine, looking like an anorexic Basset hound, delves deep into her Big Bag of Middle-Ground Evil and strips any hint of humanity from the song, gurning faux-emotion throughout.
As always here in the gloomy netherworld of Bad Cover Versions, complication arises when deciding which is the worst part. Celine’s flappy-wristed rock-star lite stylings – presumably drawn from snuff-movie footage of a mentally inadequate trainspotter allowed one five-second glance at a video of Mick Jagger, then having a gun held to his head and told to re-enact what he’d seen – are bad enough. But Anastacia’s intermittent cries of “Come on girlfriend!”, providing a glimpse of what humanity will look like in the future, when Viacom takes over and everyone is MTV-cool, are borderline evil.
There is a subtext to all this horror – who would want these two to shake them all night long? The sad answer is that the vast audience, packing the auditorium like beige sardines in the world’s stupidest tin, would.
And as they lap it up with the kind of vacant, dewy-eyed, slow-clapping enthusiasm you’d expect from cows happily chewing the cud on the way to the slaughterhouse, breathe deeply, and realise that this is what awaits us all in purgatory.
The humanity, the humanity.
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Anastacia Rocks Awsome vocalist!(Saying that she is much better singing songs she has written herself ) Although I do not like the cover . Its was done at a charity gig as a tongue in cheek cover . I don’t like Celine but at least she has a sense of humour which can’t be said for some AC/DC fans . Love AC/DC don’t really like the cover but have enough of a sense of humour to take it as it is. A BIT OF FUN !
I’ve heard Celine Dion’s cover from her Vegas show or whatever and that was torture enough. I refuse to listen to this version.
Go on… you know you want to. (Though I’m fairly sure you have already. No one can resist.)
No mention of how horrifically auto-tuned Anastacia’s vocal is?
That alone was pretty nauseating………
You missed the sweetest spot of all: The show is supported by the “Save the Music” Foundation. Now THERE’s some irony.
I don’t know which is worse – Limp Biscuit’s Faith or this. Maybe this because anorexic Celine’s little duck walk and shaking her groin just puts it over the hill for obscene. Limp Biscuit’s syncronized jumping at 2:00 was bad, but this is worse.
Celine’s duck walk and her robotic-”sexy” gyrating made my vomit up my pelvis. I think that, on balance, this is worse, because it’s entirely irony-free. They really do want to be shaken all night long.
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