- the band’s masturbatorily-themed name;
- the pathetically mindless music;
- Fred Durst’s matching cap-and-bootees ensemble;
- Fred Durst’s name;
- Fred Durst’s face;
- Fred Durst.
Who else, other than Limp Bizkit, would take a concept as obviously flawed and stupid as Rap-Rock, and not only take it seriously, but make a (briefly) globe-straddling career out of it?
There are evil geniuses at work here – ones who prey on the likelihood that you’ll be distracted deleting swathes of parental emails or too busy playing at party poker to notice that their songs have the appeal of putrid dog vomit.
Despite this, upon discovering that they have covered George Michael’s Faith, a mental routemap of exactly which direction the band is going to take quickly forms. And the sinking feeling that soon follows is confirmation that, sadly, you were wholly correct.
Surely, you thought, they can’t be so pointless as to dredge up the old ‘fake-sincere cover that suddenly turns heavy and angsty for the chorus ‘ routine?
THEY COULD BE THAT POINTLESS.
In some respects, this cover is a resounding success: Teenyboppers can sing along to lyrics they know, and still feel edgy; TV network execs can rest assured that they’re being ironic and cool; and jocks can do that snappy-finger-above-the-head thing and remark, “Dude, he just totally burned that fag Boy George Michael’s ass!” before chugging another Heineken and smashing the empty cans against their foreheads.
For the rest of us, normal, human beings, the misery associated with the original version of the song is forever compounded by Durst and Co.’s plunge into the stinking depths of the corporate-friendly-cover-version sewer.
Congratulations Fred – a generation of burger-flippers salute you.